Thank you for visiting our site and learning more about the Disruptive Hope Fund! We've been happily married since 2013 and have been looking forward to becoming parents for quite some time. Dan has been practicing his dad jokes since our first date. I’ve heard them all… and laughed at most.

 

We found so much hope in the possibility of adoption to grow our family. We didn't know many people who adopted and quickly learned that the process is far more complex, emotional, challenging, and beautiful than we ever imagined. In October of 2021, we got "the call" and matched with a baby girl due in December in Utah. We were elated after years of infertility, months of rigorous paperwork and screening, and 17 personal letters to mothers considering adoption. Someone finally chose us! At the end of December we flew to Salt Lake City, carseat and stroller in tow, anxiously awaiting when we would be called into the hospital to meet who we thought would be our baby girl.

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The morning we were scheduled to go in to meet her, I received a text. "Katie, I'm so sorry... I can't do this." We love the mom we matched with and celebrate her desire to parent, but at the same time we felt utterly broken. We couldn't believe that all of our anticipation and preparation could shatter in an instant. We were grieving the loss of a child who was still alive, but would never be ours.

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We flew home to Tennessee two days before Christmas and had a call with our adoption group. We were at a loss for what to do next. They told us in their experience the best thing we could do to heal was to try again. The months that followed were the hardest of our lives, including a second disrupted match in March 2022. There was nothing that could be done or said to take away the emptiness we felt. The only thing that helped us through that period was the hope of knowing our journey wasn't over.

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In that same conversation we asked our group what happens to families who aren't able to endure the same financial losses. They said more than half of couples in our situation paused to fundraise again and many eventually walked away entirely. We were heartbroken that these families, whose pain we knew deeply, had to live without hope. We decided to start the Disruptive Hope Fund with the mission of bringing disruptive hope to these disrupted families.

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About a year after our first match, our son Luka was born. His name means "bringer of light." He has brought us so much light, happiness, and joy after what at times felt like a long period of darkness. We are forever grateful to his first mom for entrusting him with us and her continued love.

 

Throughout this journey, helping other families continues to bring us incredible healing and has shown us how fortunate we are to be surrounded by such a loving community. We can't wait to share our story and the stories of those who the fund helps to give strength and courage to continue forward on their adoption journeys.